On December 31st, 2022 I claimed my word for 2023: pivot.
I hadn’t even thought about my ‘word’ before that night, and then suddenly pivot flew out of my mouth. I didn’t fully understand what it meant, but in that moment something bigger than me responded.
Once I said it out loud, it became real and tangible. There was no more denying it, no more pushing it down, no more pretending not to feel it. The unrest that was relentlessly swirling through my body refused to be ignored any longer. And I knew deep down that it wasn’t just one thing that needed to change, it was everything.
In the months prior, my mental health had been spiraling. I was constantly longing for more, wishing for something different and keenly aware of a gaping hole in my heart begging to be filled. I was crying myself to sleep every night and most nights waking at 3am still sobbing. My soul knew, but I hadn’t yet accepted it. The truth was the life I was living wasn’t the life I wanted to live anymore.
On that day, New Year’s Eve 2022, I surrendered to the only thing I knew to be true: it was time.
And so, on January 1, 2023, my journey began…
2023 thoughts + reflections
Note to self: do not wait until you are in a full-on mental health crisis to look deeply at your life.
Pay attention to what your body is telling you, to the inner voices, to your gut, to your dreams. Then, be willing to listen to what they are telling you.
Get still with your heart on a regular basis – this is the most important relationship you have.
Naming what is true for you is not selfish. Choosing you is not selfish.
It’s okay to want something different than what you have. It’s okay to change your mind. It’s okay to take a detour, to reroute your life. You are never stuck in the past choices you made.
Sacrificing your needs for the sake of others is madness.
Building a life where the inside matches the outside is a continuous practice. Don’t get stagnant in your practice.
If you are unhappy, look in the mirror. Don’t look anywhere else. True happiness starts from within, only you can provide that for yourself.
To create something different in your life, YOU have to be different. This is where the work begins.
The process to achieve your desired change will also be different, which will feel wrong and scary and messy. And…that’s how you’ll know it’s exactly right.
To create big change, get comfortable being uncomfortable. Like, pull up a chair and take a seat because uncomfortable is your new normal.
The four most important tools that got me through the year: a journal, a meditation app, Vitamin D and a knock-you-out-cold sleep aid.
However, the MVP Of The Year was my sisterhood. It was my turn to be in the middle, and they showed up for me in ways I didn’t even know I needed. There are no words to describe the depth of my gratitude…
Set your pride and ego aside and surrender to the power of your community. Give yourself permission to be held and supported, even when you have nothing to give back. Let their laughter and light carry you, let their wisdom and insights guide you back to yourself.
Take the leap, even if you don’t know where your feet will land. Nothing but beauty awaits you, I promise.
When the Universe gives you exactly what you’ve been asking for, be open to receive it. Don’t overthink it, don’t doubt it, don’t push it away—just simply welcome it with open arms, knowing that you deserve it.
Being fully present in every moment of every day is the only way through.
Embrace the magic and the mess of reconnecting with yourself. Be kind, compassionate and gentle with the person staring back at you in the mirror.
It’s okay to grieve what you left behind, even though you made the conscious choice to move forward without it.
Learn to savor experiences without attaching to them. Let them flow through you without holding on too tightly.
Yes, we all need external validation but it cannot be weighted more heavily than what we provide for ourselves.
“But did you let love in?” is the mantra I used to actively practice keeping my heart open this year. Find your mantra. Keep your heart open. Let love win.
There will be a moment when you smile bigger than you have all year because you see the light finally starting to shine through the darkness. And you’ll know in that moment that you have arrived, that you made it to the other side and that it was all worth it.
2023 was the most excruciating and the most extraordinary year of my life. In my pursuit of Becoming Her—the woman I dreamed of being and the life I so deeply desired—I found more than I ever imagined could be possible.
While pivot was the word I chose for the year, my friends would say the word that chose me was uncomfortable. Turns out, you cannot have one without the other. Together they are the catalyst for extraordinary change.
My word for 2024 is MAGIC. For the love of everything, I’m ready for it. <3
“I truly believe that every single person has to go through something that absolutely destroys them so they can figure out who they really are.” —Unknown
A Year in Review
To follow my journey through heartbreak, loss, grief, healing + reflection, check out my 2023 blogs:
When we hold on too tightly: on accepting + releasing what no longer serves us
Choosing Me: why is it so damn hard?
The Space Between: on heartbreak, loss + grief
You are your most precious thing: words of advice to my younger self
Transforming pain into power: rethinking how we carry the past
What is true for me right now: 21 hard truths
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